To be honest, I’m almost paralyzed by this. I’m not sure what to say yet. I have been cynical and angry with our government and people so long I can hardly believe that things have changed dramatically. I was not able to wake up this morning and be joyous and hopeful, sure of a brighter day and better future. I am getting there again – I think – but the distrust is ever so hard to scrub away. And too much has happened – there is so much to be done to fix the damage that has been wrought.

And hey. I’ve always been a Kucinich girl anyway.

But last night at the Democrat street party in Bishop Arts (more on that later) I did let myself float away on it all – well, just as soon as the news came through that Obama took Ohio. Then we knew this thing was really going to happen.

And then I cried. Finally so fucking proud that we, as a nation, have moved beyond the Civil War and elected our FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT. It was like a wall had been knocked down. I thought back on the entrenched racism of my cotton-picker grandparents (rest their souls), and how, growing up, I used to bash my head against it and despair that people could really think differently of others because they happen to have more or less melanin. How such a thing as this election hardly seemed possible even a mere 25 years ago.

Yay for us. Finally.

I am frustrated about California’s Prop 8, though. Shame on you, California. I expected better. So many of us expected better.

However – I truly believe that by virtue of the fact we just elected Obama, the breaking of the marriage barrier wall also MUST be on the near horizon. The California battle may have been lost yesterday, but we WILL win that war. If we can all come together and elect our first black president, I think surely we can come together and defeat the close-mindedness that keeps our gay and lesbian friends from enjoying the same rights heterosexual couples have.

But I’ve also learned to not expect too much from America all at once. I guess I had better just enjoy this Obama thing for a few days before looking forward to the struggles we face.